[open + closed] nothing to keep me from the storm

[64th]

Who: Cashmere + you
What: After being gone for 5 days, Cashmere returns to the hotel with the fury of 1000 suns
Where: All over the hotel
When: June 8th
Warnings: likely violence and ugly crying


Cashmere wakes up in the boiler room on the afternoon of June 8th, having disappeared without warning five days earlier. Five days in hotel time, but less than two for her. The last thing she remembers is the sharp pain of Johanna's ax cutting into her chest, but that's gone now. She thinks back - before that? Katniss' arrow in Gloss' chest. It doesn't take long for the realization she's returned to the hotel to sink in, on her feet and eventually yanking the door open with a frustrated scream and one goal - to find Katniss.

It feels like something inside her has snapped and though she's exhausted and afraid of what it means to be back at hotel ( she's dead this time. really, truly, dead just like Johanna said. there isn't anything left for her in Panem and nothing for her at the hotel.) and is propelled by the rage that threatens to spill over and the need for revenge.

open

She starts with the lobby, yelling Katniss' name as though it might get her to appear. She stops to interrogate anyone she sees, and if they were expecting Cash to be happy to see them again they've pick the wrong day for a reunion. Those from Panem won't be surprised to see her verbally lash out at people - it's falling back on old habits. She's fresh from the Games and it feels like everyone is the enemy.

She does stop by her room to be sure nothing's missing, and will respond to any tablet communication.

closed - Haymitch

Despite being told otherwise by literally everyone she's come across, Cashmere's next stop after the public areas of the hotel is Katniss' (now former) room, pounding at the door. "Katniss! Katniss! Come out, Mockingjay. Don't be a coward." There's no answer, but she's already convinced herself the girl is hiding inside.

She catches Haymitch's approach from the corner of her eye, stopping her tantrum to move protectively in front of the door. "Don't come any closer," she warns. "Unless you're here to help me find your stupid Mockingjay."

closed - Hook

After her run in with Haymitch, Cashmere's finally given up on finding her nemesis but it hasn't done a single thing to make her feel better. If anything, it makes her feel worse - too much pent up anger and no outlet for it. She returns to the lobby in search of an answer (or maybe a fight. probably a fight). She's looking positively feral: wild eyed and charcoal-dirtied hands that hint that she'd even gone so far as to poke at the fireplace like it might be filled with secrets. Cashmere doesn't notice him until he's close enough to touch her, distracted by her current task of looking through all the drawers of the front desk.

closed - Trip

Exhaustion finally wins over, but not until after Cashmere has completely trashed her room. It'll cause quite the ruckus for her neighbor. When he comes by to see what the hell she's doing, he'll find that she's pulled the mattress from her bed's frame, the table and chair have been overturned, and her belongings are scattered everywhere. She tried unsuccessfully to smash the window with her suitcase, and it lays discarded on the floor.

All knocks on her door she ignored until she's finally tired herself out. Cashmere hadn't been expecting Trip (or anyone, really) and rolls her eyes when she finds him waiting in the hall. "Can I help you?"

Comments

closed - Trip

[triplett]

Trip wasn't sitting idly in his room when the commotion had started. He had been in the middle of a shower and rushed to rinse off and get dressed at hearing the noise. It had been days with no sign of Cashmere and everyone had thought the worst. It wasn't a knock but him trying to kick the door in when she finally opened. He pushed past her--his eyes panning the room to make sure she wasn't in trouble.

"What the hell is going on?! Where the hell have you been? We've been looking all over for you!" he answered her question as brusquely as she asked it. The t-shirt he put on clung to his wet skin, not taking the time to dry too thoroughly before rushing to see what was going on in the room next door. "Was it Rumlow? Did someone hurt you?" The questions came in rapid succession. His hands clasped her face to look for any signs of injury.

[64th]

Touching her was the wrong decision, and Cashmere moves reflexively to distance herself from him with a sweep of her arms, capturing him by the wrists and shoving him roughly into the door frame. "Don't," she snaps. "I'm not a little girl." He didn't deserve that and later she'll feel a little bad about it, but she doesn't regret any of it at the moment.

She still feels explosive, and takes a step back to give herself more space. "I went home." It's not much of an explanation, but it might be enough for him to figure out that she's not doing so well.

[triplett]

That wasn't the reaction he expected by far. In the past, Cashmere had been cynical and bitter over circumstances but never toward him. This was...something was wrong. Trip quickly pushed himself off the doorframe and took a more stable stance. "Home? What do you mean you went home? How?" he asked with the utter confusion on his features and inflection.

[64th]

It's a reasonable question. It's also one she doesn't have an answer to. "I was here and then I was back in the Games right where I'd left off. Then I died." She'd known she wasn't going to win - she'd even known Johanna would be the one who killed her, but she hadn't expected things to end like they did. "And now I'm back in the universe's shittiest hotel." she huffs, and then adds sarcastically: "and how's your day going?"

She hasn't been able to shake the memory of watching her brother die, not for a second. Her stomach turns again, and she closes her eyes to count to two and try to not fall to pieces about it.

[triplett]

"Cashmere." Her name is said with emotion, not warning. Maybe she hadn't seen his dream. Maybe she had. He loved Skye but Trip wasn't fool enough to believe it was to the depths that Cashmere loved her twin. So while he knew the pain she was going through, he recognized hers was more severe. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. You're not alone here."

It wasn't time yet to explain that he meant both what she experienced and physically in the hotel. He wanted to hug her but only if it brought comfort, not further turmoil. Trip couldn't just stand there when she closed her eyes. His arms enveloped her as he held his breath both figuratively and literally.

[64th]

She had seen his dream, but it's not what she's thinking of right now. Cash is more upset about her own death than she expected to be, but the loss of Gloss is an open wound ten times worse. As far as she's concerned, it doesn't matter how well people understand or how many friends surround her, she will always be alone.

The hug is unexpected and she tolerates it for a second before stiffening under his touch and pushing away. She's less rough this time, but only because she breaks from the hug easily. It's too much closeness to have with anyone at the moment. "Stop. Doing. That." She waves a hand at him, and then at herself. "Your space. My space." Her voice breaks on the last word. Feeling defeated, she sighs. "Nothing is going be be okay."

[triplett]

At least she didn't punch him in the throat. Cashmere was well within her right to deny the contact. He gave a nod of acknowledgment and took a few steps away. No form of argument could be made against her last statement though he was one who always tried looking at the bright side. Trip watched her with sad eyes.

"I'm sorry for your loss. I met Haymitch and Annie while you gone. They explained what you might've gone back to. ...Let me at least fix the room for you?" he offered quietly. He'd offer to be her personal punching bag if it'd help any.

[64th]

Haymitch and Annie, right. Just more confirmation that everyone she'd been dumb enough to trust just because they were from home has been keeping secrets from her for months. She kicks petulantly at the bed frame and shrugs at his offer.

With everything overturned there's no where to sit and the dismantled bed will make it difficult to sleep (not that she's interested in sleeping but she'll have to give in sooner rather than later). The only reason for destroying the room had been to get some of the anger that was inside onto the outside, which says something about her lack of appropriate coping skills and maybe about her common sense too.

"Fine," she agrees as though it's her doing him the favor and not the other way around. "You can help." No promises that she won't try to put anything through the wall again.

closed - haymitch

[advising]

Somehow, Haymitch always ends up encountering the emotionally unstable ones in the hallways. First the Pirate, and now Cashmere. He'd wondered where she'd been -- it's been days without hearing some snide remark over the network, if not passing her in the corridors or at breakfast.

When he rounds the corner to the sounds of shouting and the pounding of the door, Haymitch pauses, hands up in mock surrender. Of all people, he knows that wild-eyed sort of fury too well. Didn't they all look like that after their Games?

"She's not here, Cashmere." He'll tread lightly, because she's throwing Mockingjay around in a way she hadn't before, which immediately begins to raise red flags. He steps closer, despite her warnings. "Think you've beat the door enough, as it is."

[64th]

"She has to be here." Cashmere's edging on desperation. Her entire life has been built around protecting her brother and Katniss took that all away in seconds. She hasn't decided what she'd do when she gets to Katniss but Cashmere has a few ideas and most of them involve a lot of blood.

She doesn't warn him to stop, but scowls, holding her spot instead of backing up further. "You can't protect her."

[advising]

"No, apparently, she doesn't. I don't know where she's gone."

Haymitch knows that desperation, knows the fury that sits quietly until it can't be contained anymore. The Games do something to those hairtriggers -- make them both harder to trip and easier to break, all at the same time.

"And I'm not protecting her. She's gone. Poof, vanished, disappeared. So go on, wait at the door but that's not hers anymore, sweetheart, and it wouldn't do you any good to go on a killing spree right about now anyway."

[64th]

She's not entirely convinced, and that shows in her expression. Cashmere eyes him, her distrust growing as she mentally picks apart what he's said.

"Why would I kill her?" Cashmere asks after a beat. "Other than her obvious obnoxious idiocy." How much does Haymitch know? She hasn't told him a thing, so anything he's getting at, he's known all along. Cashmere's never been much in the way of friendly towards the girl, but since their arrival at the hotel she's never attempted any harm other than verbal barbs.

It's her turn to take a step closer to him. "What do you know? Why would you say I want to kill anyone?"

[advising]

Haymitch does not waver, stands his ground despite her movements. He's dealt with far worse than Cashmere before and will only deal with worse in his future, he's sure of it. He knows her to a degree -- they spend a few weeks a year together, playing nice and being perfect little Capitol pawns, after all.

"I know that look, sweetheart, and you're not exactly waiting for her to come out and do the hugging and singing songs bit."

He shrugs, waiting to see what it is she may have discovered, but he's almost one hundred percent certain he knows what it is. "You're a victor, who don't you want to kill? But she's gone. Knock and throw a fit all you want, she's disappeared." And whether he means to or not, his voice has taken on a bit of a raw edge to it, and he takes one step closer to Cashmere.

[64th]

She doesn't like his tone or the way he steps towards her, like she's the one in the wrong. Cashmere's done a lot of bad in her life but this time she's the one who is innocent. She won't let him paint her as the villain after she's lost so much.

"Back off, Haymitch," she warns again. "I'm not in the mood for your bullshit." Cashmere stiffens her jaw, staring him down. "Do you know what she did to me? Yes or no."

[advising]

The Hunger Games has no true innocents in its lot -- the Victors and Tributes alike all have some motive, all are willing to kill to stay alive and although they all start innocent, they end the games sullied, damaged. Those are the people who face off in the hallway, victors, not people. Haymitch knows her fury like its his own.

"Yes."

He can't lie, and he won't. Haven't they all lost someone, something, to the Games? to the Capitol? "And it sucks. It more than sucks, but now's not the time nor the place for this. Grief, yes. Rage? No."

Says the man who half destroyed his home in the Victor's Village when he found his family and girlfriend slaughtered.

[64th]

She feels betrayed.

They've never been friends in the traditional sense of the word - hard to be friends when you come from such different places and only see each other for a few weeks a year - but she's always had a strange respect for him. He didn't win the Quell by accident and he's had her back a few times over the years. How could he have known this whole time and not found the need to warn her of what waited at home?

Given the choice between grief and rage, she will always choose rage. Grief feels like giving into the weakness that she's spent so many years denying that she has. Rage can keep her going. It's how she survived her first Games and it's all she knows to cling to now.

"You lied!" And Cashmere takes a swing at him, aiming for his nose.

[villainously]

Things haven't been at their greatest around the hotel, but at least they've calmed down a bit. Or, they had, until Hurricane Cashmere hit with devastating force. Hook missed her, though being glad she's trapped here seems a little cruel... it's an understatement, though, that whatever she experienced at home has left her worse for the wear. He's used to this destruction, wild and unfocused, because he's done it before. He wonders what triggered it with her.

Hard to ask her, when she's running around snapping and destroying whatever she can get her hands on. A dangerous state of mind for the pirate to sneak up on her, but the only way to stop her is very likely to remove her from the situation. It's very much a pirate solution, to pick her up without even considering the fact she might smack him or worse for it. "If you kick me, darling, I'll kick you back." He probably means it. He expects her to protest, he just doesn't care; she's going to her room.

[64th]

Cashmere doesn't get picked up often - perhaps a combination of her height and ability to be terrifying when she wants to be - so she's not expecting him to scoop her up and screams loudly in protest. Losing her mind has given everyone good reason to steer clear of her, and if anyone's noted her scream (which they probably have, given it's banshee-like qualities), no one running to her 'rescue.'

She kicks at him despite the warning and because she doubts he'd actually kick her back. He might be a pirate, but he's a pirate with a weird sense of morality. "Let go of me!" She kicks at him again for good measure. "Stop!"

Clearly, her work of attempting to dismantle the hotel is important work and he's interrupting it. Can't he see that she's trying to have mental breakdown here?

[villainously]

It's not that she isn't terrifying. She's all teeth and wild eyes and not so veiled hints at violence. It's just that when you've lived a lifetime of that it intimidates you less. He thinks Cashmere could do a number on him if she wanted to—he just thinks even in her dangerous, recoiling state, she doesn't actually want him dead.

It's hard to kick what he seems so intent on hauling bodily toward the stairs. "I will," and he will... Just maybe not as soon as she wants. One of the kicks is sound enough to earn a grunt. "This won't fix anything." He wishes it would. He's tried destruction and violence to mask his pain, it doesn't make it go away and it won't make her feel better.

Whether she's listening or not, they're going toward the stairs. If he thinks she can be trusted to walk herself, he'll let her down.

[64th]

He's right - she doesn't want to do him any real harm. He just happens to be in her way at the moment. If she meant to actually hurt him she would have already. "Let me down!" she demands again. "I didn't do anything!" which is a bold-faced lie.

Lashing out at others and general property destruction is the only way she knows how to possibly handle all the grief and rage built up inside her. After a bad night in the Capitol she'd turn her anger on the other victors (who'd grown used to it anyway) and eventually her frustration would wash away. It's not working this time, though. She's miserable.

[villainously]

Carrying her up the stairs it is, then. It's not easy and it's very lucky he makes it without dropping her. Both of them falling down the stairs is also not going to help anything. Well, she might be forced to think about what troubles her if she can't move, instead of storming and fighting like she can keep those truths away if she fights hard enough. There's only so long she can go before she breaks and really breaks, and he knows well enough that is something she'd be better off not doing in the lobby.

He's stronger than he looks, considering how far he has to take her to get to her door. He's a bit winded from it but when he finally does set her down, it's only so he can point at the handle. "Open it." The fact is he doesn't know how to help her with that storm brewing inside her, either. He's never been good at sorting out his. But doesn't someone have to try? Emma had anchored him when he needed it but as far as he knows, Cashmere doesn't have an equivalent here. Even wild eyed and raw with pain, Cashmere is about all he has left as a friend in this place. So he's going to try.

[64th]

Getting her way is not much of a victory, but at least her feet are on the ground. Cashmere tosses her hair back over one shoulder, like this is any other day and being forcefully carried to her room didn't just happen. She looks from Hook, to the door, and back again. "Are you going to ground me? What if I don't? You can't make me open it." She snorts. "You don't think you can break it down, do you?"

Maybe she will unlock it, maybe she won't. Cashmere hasn't decided yet. Pushing his buttons and being petulant gives her a little satisfaction. She can fight the grief that threatens to strangle her, stuff it down inside and take a swipe at everyone else to convince them that she's not shattered. She'll give in to him, eventually. He just has to wear her down first.

[villainously]

Hook is a captain. He's used to his orders being taken. Granted he hasn't had men to order around for longer than he's been here, he's still not impressed by her petulance. It seems an elaborate act to prove to him she doesn't have to do what he asks, even though the fact she didn't break his nose and head for the stairwell might be an indication she isn't entirely opposed to it.

"I can pick it open," the pirate informs her, because pirate. Of course he can. He doubts that capacity is really going to help him, though. He softens, barely perceptible but there if one could squint. She's raw and reeling, even if physically she's all right, but he's still happy to see her. He was worried. "Open it, Cashmere. Please." He not her captain, an order might be the wrong tone. He's her friend, and friends don't make orders. It's an attempt to remind her he's on her side, despite the bodily removal from the lobby.

[oceanborne]

It's really the yelling that gives it away -- Annie can think of only two people who are, or have been, in this hotel who would go around shouting for Katniss Everdeen like they'd enjoy nothing more than pummeling her into dust. And she's pretty sure that Johanna is mostly over her rage-screaming phase, which narrows the field down to one. Annie abandons the screening room and the continually-looping film to slip out into the lobby, and yep. There's Cashmere, as if she never left.

Cashmere's back is turned to her, so Annie tries to take a quick moment and figure out how to approach her. There's not a whole lot of ways she sees this ending well, but she'd be a terrible ally friend if she didn't at least make the attempt.

"She's not here, Cashmere. She's gone." Quick and to the point, though who knows if it'll even penetrate the force field of Cashmere's (entirely justified, in Annie's mind) blind rage.

[64th]

Cashmere freezes, and turns to face Annie. Maybe it's the truth, maybe it's not. "No." She can't accept the fact her chance for revenge has slipped away from her for what feels like the second time in the last few hours. "I'm here, and Katniss is here somewhere she's just hiding because she knows what she did."

That's all she needs to do. Find Katniss. Just to make things even, and then she'll agree to try and settle back in to the hotel.

"Come on, Annie." Cashmere smiles. It's practiced but it doesn't reach her eyes. Her eyes are all fire. "You and me, we're friends. Careers stick together. I'm sure you've seen her. All I want to do is set a few things straight. Victor to victor. Just tell me where she is."